Thursday, November 29, 2012

Take a sip

Motherhood is a beautiful thing. I will start this post by saying I really do feel blessed to have my son in my life and to be able to stay home with him.

But....

Being a mom is a hard job. In a conversation with a friend she said "[motherhood] is so hard! Nobody ever talks about how hard it is!" It's true, we don't. We smile and say everything is great- and share pictures of smiles and happy moments. Well, I'm here now, and I'll talk about it!

Everyone, take a [metaphorical] sip.

I think most of the pressure lies with the fact that WE as parents are responsible for every aspect of our child's life; feeding, bathing, play, teaching, diapers (and potty training), and their psychological well being. WE are responsible for how they turn out! Sure, you can go back and forth all day about nature vs. nurture- but let's be real here. Have you ever heard of a serial killer that had a perfect childhood?

Insert the studies. Such-and-such study says that spanking will harm your child psychologically, and this one says crying it out will leave your child thinking NOBODY will EVER be there for them, and that one talks about helicopter patenting and spoiling and entitlement issues.
So let me get this strait- I'm supposed to baby wear, put a smile on for temper tantrums, be there for him 24/7- without looking at him? How in the...?

Here's what I've taken from it- I'll research benefits of multiple parenting techniques and use the ones I feel comfortable with. I baby wear when appropriate, but we also have a stroller. I read to my son and tend to his every need during the day- but I do NOT put up with temper tantrums. I don't spank- but if I find myself at my wits end I'll put him in his crib for a minute or two and shut the door. I'm not talking crying because something is wrong- I mean full-on, feet kicking, head rolling, no-tears-tantrum because he didn't get his way. I will have more patience with him than I've had for anyone EVER but- I still have a breaking point. Sometimes I use deep breathing techniques, sometimes I cry! But if he is fed and changed and healthy- two minutes in his crib won't hurt him. (He is two weeks shy of a year old by the way).

Take a sip.

Another hard part is that no matter what you do- you're wrong! Formula feed (for whatever reason) and you're frowned at. Only breastfeed for 6mo or a year? Shame on you! You breastfeed past a year? Jeeze you better cut the cord before college! Baby wear? Hippy. Stroller?? Distant. Spend most of your time with them? Helicopter mom!! Don't spend enough time? You're neglectful. Make your own food? More time lost! Buy baby food- you're lazy! Stay at home mom? Lazy freeloader. Working mom?? You pay someone to raise your kids!

Nothing you do will ever please everyone.
..ever....

But- so long as you are not abusing or actually neglecting your child- you can only do what YOU feel is best for YOUR child. Take those little precious moments that melt your heart- and hold them close for the hard days.
Take a sip. Breathe- and know that you're not alone.

I'm sure there will be more added on this subject, but I feel content with my rant of the day! If there is a subject you feel should be discussed or put out there- feel free to leave a comment.

Hug your kids, and have a good day!

xo
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Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Winter fashion quickie

Ok, mama is sick- but I thought I'd update you on a couple fashion trends to try this winter!

Our outfits tend to match the weather this season- dark. This year, cozy a pastel colored sweater! I just got a pink pastel knit.

But- we don't have to leave dark behind! One thing I'm seeing around again is black eye shadow! (Yay!) Quick and easy- black on black. Plus? You don't have to be perfect with the liner, because the black shadow will cover it! Be adventurous and try a black Smokey eye this winter

Xo
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Monday, November 19, 2012

out of state- out of my mind

Okay- so we are out of state for Thanksgiving, visiting my family.  Normally, this drive takes us about 7 hours. Today? It took us 11..... ELEVEN hours with an 11 month old. Let me start from the beginning.

We woke at 2:00am, made coffee, and loaded the rest of what we needed into the car before waking our son.  our neighbor (we live in a condo- 6 to a building) saw that we were up and knocked on our door.  It scared the day lights out of me!! But, I answered and asked what was going on.  She smiled, and asked if we had heat.
.....well I did notice that our heat was 10 degrees lower than what we set it on, but I guess I thought nothing of it at 2am.
Apparently the whole building was without heat.  I wasn't worried- we were about to leave for the week!

 Around 3, we woke him, changed him, and I nursed him.  We were on the road by 3:30.  We decided to give him his birthday gift early-  a leappad2- to keep him entertained for the long drive.  Everything started out just perfectly.  Our son was content, and it didnt take long until he was fast asleep again.

the first stop
a couple of hours in, we decided to stop and stretch our legs.  we pulled off of the highway and into a rest area. We had a plan: diaper, nurse, pee, snack, go!  Well, come to find out, the rest area was CLOSED and wouldnt open for over an hour! Once I was standing, my need to pee became an emergency.  Ever since my c-section, my bladder has been similar to that of a two year old's.  I had to go, and I had to go RIGHT THEN. 

I looked around- no port-a-pottys.  The entire rest area was filled with truck drivers, and a state trooper pulled in-- so the bushes and trees were not an option.  I knew there was nothing in the car I could use. So, what did I do?

I sat in the back seat.
and used not one- but two of my son's diapers.
I had to go that badly!

My husband was in the front seat, laughing at me, but I didnt care.  It was better than my pants!



the home
about an hour later we got a call from our heating company.  They said the problem had been fixed, and they were wondering if our furnace had turned on by itself.  We explained that we were out of state, and wouldn't be home for a week.  She asked if we could get a hold of our landlord as a percaution, just to make sure our pipes didnt freeze while we were gone.  She did add that the others were working fine, so there was a good chance that ours would be fine too.

our landlord? she's not only out of state for the holiday- she's out of COUNTRY!



back on the road
My son's interest in the LeapPad was off and on, but I had a secret weapon- My mom's portable DVD player.  I popped in a Baby Einstein DVD and put it on loop!  He was in heaven- talking to it and clapping his hands with the music.  I was able to read a little while he was so content!  However, this pure bliss only lasted for two hours- Then the DVD player died.

oye.
back to singing, switching out toys, and a whole lot more stopping to stretch!


after several stops and a few traffic jams- we finally arrived! I'm excited to be surrounded by family, and exhausted from our long ride. I'm hoping our getaway goes a little bit better than our day went!

what are you doing for Thanksgiving?
xo
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Trip!

I'm going out of state to see family for the holiday. You know what that means? New clothes to show off!

I got a few gift cards and went shopping. I'll do outfits of the day during my trip!

......however, I'm currently in " car clothes" (aka yoga pants, nursing bra, and a sweater). No pic of that! :)

Xo
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Sunday, November 11, 2012

thoughts on "The Other F Word"

The Other F Word Poster

I had wanted to see "The Other F Word" since I first caught wind of it being released. I was finally able to sit down last night and watch it. My mom was spending her usual Saturday one-on-one time with my son, and it was the perfect time to put on headphones and watch. (there is quite a lot of profanity in the movie)

For those who have never heard of it- It is a documentary about punk rockers and their transition into parenthood (the other F word being Father).  I have listened to these bands for years, and I was very interested in seeing how a teenage anarchist could morph into a responsible, loving parent.  It was no surprise that most of these men did not have positive male role models in their life.  Most of their fathers either left or were neglectful or abusive.  It became their mission to become better fathers than the ones who gave life to them.

During the first half of the movie I found myself laughing out loud at some of their interviews.  I smiled at the parts I could relate to- and felt a hint of guilt at how much time they spend touring and away from home, as this has become the main source of a bands income.  I am guilty of downloads, as are most of us. I never imagined that a band like Pennywise would have to spend over 200 days on tour to make ends meet at home.  They wanted to be there for their children, but at the same time needed to provide for them and put food on the table.

The second half was filled with more humor and information I never knew about some of my favorite rockers- but something unexpected happened; I found myself crying, more than once, about some of their life stories.
crying.

All in all- it is a fantastic movie.  Even if you don't listen to the music, or were never part of the "scene," it is an interesting and inspiring glimpse into the lives and families of some of the most influential punk rockers of our time.

check out the movie's website here.

xo
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Sunday, November 4, 2012

Playing Catchup

Hello!

My oh my, I have been neglecting my blog!  I have been busy at home with my son, and I have been crafting like crazy! Apparently.... I can crochet! who knew? Let me explain...

Two of my son's friends had birthdays last month- the same weekend! Money was a little tight, so gift giving was taking a back seat. However, both girls have been a very big part of my son's life so far, so I wanted to give them something.  My sister had let me borrow a crochet hook months before this, and I had practiced a few lines.  I looked up "crochet hat tutorial" on youtube, and low and behold- I whipped up a couple hats! They came out so cute!

  

After sharing these hats on a few social networks, I got FOUR custom orders from other people! And it grew from there! Now, I am preparing for a craft show on Dec 1st- on top of planning my son's first birthday party! (and the day to day stay at home mom duties)

Tomorrow is a shopping day- I'll make another fashion post soon with my finds!

oh, and check out my new craft page: Off With Their Hats

xo
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